3D - 2 - the 3D ultra sound,confirm a missing left hand.am not keeping the baby .am 21 weeks pregnant.19 married?

the 3D ultra sound,confirm a missing left hand.am not keeping the baby .am 21 weeks pregnant.19 married?

we whated this baby,but after a second ultrasound it really showed that the baby girl doesn t have a left hand.i am thinking abortion,she wont grow normally everybody would pick on her i wish i knew befor or never got pregnant to get to this half way pregnancy and having to abort it. imagine it was you or (god forbide) your expected child,what would you do at 21 week of pregnancy? imagine how scared i am of abortion i never belived in it,now i have to go thruw it. i could die,i could never have kids ever in my life! here s my question 1)what would you do if you just found out at 21 weeks you were having a baby with a missing part of the body? what are the risks of a second trimester abortion? what are the risks of never being able to have kids in the future ? please unswear me honestly

Public Comments

its JUST A HAND!!!! every thing else is going to be fine--kids made fun of my big nose-- they make fun of everything-- that is killing a perfectly healthy baby-- she doesnt have some serious serious mental issue- so you sould not even consiter it!!! but you will have to live with yourself for that ITS JUST A HAND- ITS NOT HER LUNG OR HER HEART!!!
I could not abort over a hand.
I am sorry you have to deal with this but you would get rid of your baby this far along bc she doesnt have a hand? I believe that to be superficial. There are babies born conjoined and other horrible things and you're just worried about you you you. I am sorry I am 27 weeks along so I am TRYING to symapathize with you but I can't.
Are you serious ?? I do not agree with your thoughts. A child is a child, and all people are beautiful in their own ways !! Do not abort ur baby if she is missing a hand.
I'm not sure, but I think at 21 weeks I would not be able to go through with the abortion, if you don't want the baby what about placing her up for adoption? I'm not sure about the risks or anything, but anything could happen, it is dangerous. I'm sorry that your in this situation and hope you can find an alternative.
you are the most selfish ignorant person i have ever come across in my life. just because the baby is missing a hand you want to kill it? Your mom didnt get rid of you and you are obviously missing a huge portion of your brain and heart. and this is an honest answer, your stupid and selfish. Dont have an abortion but plese if this is how you feel about your baby give it up for adoption
Are you serious? You're going to kill your baby because she's not perfect? How selfish and shallow of you!
you are just selfish!!!! you want to abort this far along because the baby doesn't have a hand. what is wrong with you???
I certainly would not abort! I believe every child has the right to love.....missing arm or not. Do you even realize that at 21 weeks it's quite common for the aborted baby to try to breath on its own, and left to lay there and die....slowly....this does happen. I dont even think most places would abort now, you know your very selfish!
It is actually illegal to have an abortion after 14 weeks. Give her up for adoption if you do not want her. I personally think you are selfish. You should love your child no matter what!
That's horrible. No one is going to pick on her and if they do you should teach her not to let it get to her. Aborting because of a minor flaw???? Geez....if you're that vain then maybe you should just put her up for adoption to a family that will love her unconditionally.
Are you kidding me? What if your parents got rid of you because of a missing hand??
IT'S A HAND NOT A LUNG!!! ITS NOT GENETIC!! OH WOW!!
At 21 weeks you are going to have to deliver your baby through labour. If I found out at 21 weeks that my baby (Iam 12 weeks) has a missing limb, I personally would carry on with the pregnancy. Think carefully, get all the advice you can, Get another ultrasound just to be sure. Seek help you need support as this is one of the biggest decisions of your life and you need to make the right decision for you. EDIT: In UK law permits abortions up to 24 weeks, but allows abortions up to 39 weeks in cases of disability. Not saying it is right it is just the law. There are moves in Parliament to change it but doesn't have a lot of support. It will be painful and awful but at the end of the day it is your body your decision. It isn't the physical damage you need worry about but your own mental state so get good advice and counscelling on this one.
Since you asked for honestly, I will be honest.... I am pro-choice, so ultimately I think it is your body = your choice. BUT, I would never abort a baby simply because he or she is missing a hand. Having children is not like buying appliances.....you don't get to give them back when they aren't as perfect as you want them to be. There are no guarantees with children. Even if your baby was born with no health issues, there is no guarantee that he or she won't experience some kind of problem later in childhood. It is the risk that you take when you decide to have kids; if you can't accept it, then don't have kids. Anyhow, a child can live quite a wonderful life despite missing a hand.
A child's a child. No physical deformity should control the amount of love you have. Factors such as death would be a reson to have an abortion. I understand that you don't want your child to be harmed by others' harsh words, but it's your child, and the love you give them counts most. Please, think this over.
If your daughter was born with both hands, then had an accident and lost a hand, would you kill her? I really don't think you would. There is nothing wrong with your baby. You could have a child with both hands, they could still end up getting teased. It is not enough to deny a person their life.
That has to be really hard but....my mom had an abortion when she was 15 not because anything was wrong but because her dumb parents were embarressed...she has had to live with that her whole life and it kills her! And just a side note just because she doesnt have a hand doesnt mean she will be picked on........one of the most popular girls in school who also happened to be the team captain of our cheerleading team was missing her hand and that obviously didnt hold her back! good luck and god bless
This is a partial birth abortion. I don't think you'll be making a wise decision to abort over a missing hand. it's not that big of a deal. BTW- babies have survived when they have been born at 21 or 22 weeks.
If it were my child I wouldn't care if baby was missing a body part. No one is perfect. What would you do if after your baby was born, Something was wrong and they needed to amputate the hand. Would you kill baby. Murder it. I dont believe in abortion either. But especially 2nd trimester abortion. That baby is a living being. Just like you. If you lost a hand do you want to be killed. If you abort this child you dont deserve children in the future. Especially over a hand.
that is still your child would you really not love it over a hand, i would not abort especially at that stage of pregnancy,
It is just a hand.. It is probably harder on you than it will ever be on your child. Talk to someone who is missing a hand and see if they wish they were never born?? She can be a wonderful blessing in your life and others but not if you are going to treat her like she is a cripple!!!!! You could at least give her up for adoption their are families that adopt unwanted handicap children.
many people live normal lives without legs! a hand is just a hand. your sick if you think that the child will not be normal because of a missing hand
In your question you say "she wont grow normally".. are there other conditions you didn't mention? If not and it is only a missing hand, I would NEVER in a million years abort my precious little princess. Kids tease each other about everything anyway.. we have all been teased and we all still made it unscathed! Even if there were no other complications to having an abortion you would never forgive yourself for throwing away this child. She is made the way she is for a reason. Maybe she is meant to grow up and invent prosthetic arms for children. Or maybe she is meant to grow up and learn a way to prevent pre-natal abnormalities. Or maybe she is meant to just grow up and be the angel in your life. Either way, please give her a chance.
You aren't getting the response i think you were looking for when you asked this question. And i agree with every answer. ADOPTION!!!
Is abortion even legal at 21 weeks? My sympathy on your shock, but consider this. There are children born with spinal bifida, and downs syndrome every day who grow to be beautiful human beings. Your daughter may be able to be fitted for a prosthesis when she is old enough. Please reconsider. You never know what amazing things she may accomplish.
its just a hand... either way it goes, its your baby... one hand or 2 you should still give her a chance at life... i actually know a girl with 1 hand and she lives a very normal life... abortion because of a missing limb is crazy... give ehr up for adoption if you dont want her because of a missing hand.. im sure there are plenty of people out there that could love her to no end, with or without a hand..
What would you do if you had a three year old that lost their hand due to an accident? Would you give that child up to the state? Would you lock that child up in their room for the rest of their days? Or would you give lots of cuddles and help your child learn to do things one handed? This baby is already a person to you. Because of that, you would really regret an abortion. I would not abort even if I learned that my child had no brain and would not survive more than a few hours after birth. Take heart. You've been through a terrible shock. You've been hoping that you would have a perfect little baby and found out that things may not be so perfect. Take some time to cry and then go forward with the pregnancy.
omg do you not care about the little bundle of joy inside you that shouldn't matter to you this baby should be your little pride and joy you should love it no matter how it looks you are very messed up in the head
What would you do if you were in an accident and lost a body part? Would you kill yourself? I understand that it's a shock, and not something that we plan for while we're pregnant, but unfortunately it's happening. I don't think killing your daughter because she is missing a hand is going to make you feel any better. Is she going to be teased? Maybe...but she would be teased over something even if she did have both hands. She is your daughter, and she deserves to live.
I would NEVER EVER EVER abort over a missing limb, people could pick on her if THEY thought she wasn't pretty enough, seriously, that is a horrible thing for a mother to do, not loving her child because she isn't PERFECT!!! Here's for your HONEST ANSWERS........ 1)what would you do if you just found out at 21 weeks you were having a baby with a missing part of the body? I would of course be concerned for my child, but NEVER once would think of killing him/her, I would just prepare for when they arrived, and then I would accept it and go on being happy the rest of my pregnancy. what are the risks of a second trimester abortion? You could die just like with any other medical surgery, you could become infertile and never be able to have any kids at all, or nothing could happen except you would have to live with the fact that you killed your own child because she was missing a hand...omg! If you do kill this child because she is missing a hand, I hope you can never have kids again, which may cause me to get the thumbs down, but the is one of the most horrible things I have ever heard, poor girl, mommy doesnt love her cause she isnt perfect :(
I have to say i am completely pro-choice and wouldn't say that you should never have an abortion. I completely believe in abortion rights. That said, i cannot imagine having an abortion just because the fetus has a hand missing. That is not a big deal. It is such a minor deformity. Hate to tell you, but your kid will be picked on no matter what. Kids pick on other kids. You are concerned about things like your future fertility and your health after an abortion, neither of these should be of much concern. Legal abortion is safe. But I would ask yourself questions like, "Why am i worried about a slight deformity? Is this going to impact my child's health? Will she be able to grow up and have a family and a career and be happy?" Because she will! She could have something much more serious wrong with her and have a happy life! I have never advised another woman to not have an abortion, but, i think i'm going to in this case. If you wanted to have the baby, why would such a small thing cause you to want to terminate? Maybe you didn't really want to have the baby? Because it's not a big deal. Maybe you should just give your baby up for adoption because i guarantee there will be people that wouldn't be upset over such a minor problem.
All kids get made fun of. That is just life. There are also plenty of people who lose a limb or two throughout there life. I know a few quadriplegics, and they still want to live. Have you ever seen the shows on the women who were born w/ no arms. They are able to drive, have a family, take care of their baby's. There are also people who have no legs and they live full lives. You should Google it and see if you can find any footage on it. It is truly amazing. I would keep her, she will amaze you and make you laugh and in the end you feel so blessed that you kept her.
do you really think abortion is the answer just because she doesn't have a hand? Missing a hand has nothing to do with living. There are MANY people out there without a hand that do just fine. Do you think all of them should have been aborted? I think there are certain situations in pregnancy where i would consider abortion (if the baby is dying, or if having her would kill me...or if they had a condition that would lead to CERTAIN death....not just worried she might get "picked on" for not having a hand.) Please do not be so shallow as to think that your baby would be less of a person because she didn't have a hand! you never know, she could be the person who finds a cure to cancer....but she was aborted because she didn't have a HAND! It's a hand....just a hand....if i had to decide to be born without a hand or to have not been born at all....DUHHHHHHHHHH i'd rather be born without a hand!!!
You asked the question earlier...and if you didn't get the response you wanted don't think the "afternoon crew" is going to give you the answer you're looking for. Abortion is wrong and even more so in the second trimester!! You can feel your baby moving for God's Sake!! And you want to kill it. If you go through with this I would hope and pray you couldn't have another child. This shows what kind of parent you will be...when they screw up you give them away??!?! Prepare for your childs disability. It's a hand! Not her heart...and yes she has one...and believe it or not if you were to deliver now there is a possibility she would live!! But you're going to kill her....sick sick people. I really hope this is someone who is just playing on the computer since it's spring break.....trying to upset us pregnant women.
Abortion should not even be in your mind. You made the choice to get pregnant and have a baby. There are thousands of people who cannot get pregnant and would do anything for a baby no matter what.... God made your baby, and he gave this miracle to you to take care of and cherish! Be thankful you can have children. I lost my first baby. I can not stand hearing people say they dont want their babies. I tell them not to have sex than if they cant handle it. I am 6 weeks pregnant now and can not imagine those words ever coming out of my mouth. If you cant handle having a perfectly healthy baby that just happens to have no left hand, than maybe your not ready to be a mother. A mother loves her child unconditionally... NO MATTER WHAT! You really need to pray about this.... But you know in your heart what the right thing to do is
If i found out my baby is missing a body part I would still love it no matter what. There are things called prosthesis and now a days you cant even tell the differance. I would never even think of aborting my child no matter how far along I was just a few weeks or 21 weeks. I personally think you would find it very hard to find a Doctor that will give you an abortion this far along. If you cant stand the fact that your baby will be without a hand give it up for adoption there are plently of people out there who want children and a missing hand wouldnt matter. A child could live a perfectly normal life with one hand.
Honestly, I wouldn't do it. I am 26 weeks pregnant and the only reason I would have aborted was some abnormality that was incompatable with life. I've known many people either born without limbs or lost a limb in the course of their lives. And I don't know one who wished that they weren't born. I can see your side. You dream of a perfect baby, ten toes on each foot, ten fingers on each hand, and any threat to that dream is devastating, but she is still perfect. There are prosthesis now that can help her and when she's older they may have some technology that can mimic a normal hand. It's just cosmetic. You can still drive with one hand, play sports, eat, and live a full life with limited interuptions. It is too bad that there are some situations in life that force you to make split second decisions, such as an abortion this late in the game. If anything, this situation warrants more time for you two to think about. Many first reactions are based on naivity and inexperience. You should do some research with the limited window you have, educate yourself on children with physical abnormalities and your options on treatment. Then decide what you want to do. I consider myself pro-life, but I am educated abouted abortion and it's risks. Yes you could be left infertile, but this is rare. You could die, but this too is rare. People have abortions all the time throughout the world and in a first world country, complications for you are very rare when done by an experienced doctor. Here is a link to a helpful website about abortion, it's risks and the different procedures: http://www.optionline.org/abortion.html It is ultimately your choice. Good luck with your decision.
if i was 21 weeks and i was having a baby who was missing a body part i would still keep the baby. i would still keep the baby because its just a hand!! its not like its the babys head! its weird. i wouldnt even abort the baby. and besides i dont even think that you can abort this far long. you could probably die or damage yourself in a very harmful way if you do the second trimester abortion. if you wanted to have more kids in the future you probably wouldnt beable to do it..
Ok, I can understand that you are upset to hear that your baby has no left arm- however at 21 weeks babies have actually survived outside the womb. The risks are huge for you- bleeding, etc- however do you know the procedure that they use- not even sure if you can find someone to do a 21 week abortion anymore- it is basically delivering your baby- except for the head- and then they (sorry)- cut the skull- you wanted to know- even though the baby has no left arm- she/he has a heart that has been beating since just 3 weeks after conception- everything is there that will be at 40 weeks except smaller. Please do not abort.
Are you freakin kidding me?????????? what are you thinking, it is just a hand not nothing else and you want to end a life that not only is aware of this but a piece of you that you have already grown attached to over a flipin hand? What if you lost your hand right now? would you commit suicide and would you want some one to end your life. Please grow up and think about what you are doing.
If i found out this at 21 weeks, abortion wouldn't cross my mind at all! This is a real baby, if it was born now it can survive! It's only a hand........some babies are born really sick and all you care about is not having a hand.........man you are heartless! Atleast give it up for adoption, someone will love that baby.....If you have an abortion this late it's kills the baby and the baby will feel that pain.....and maybe you won't be able to have anymore kids! Go to youtube and watch the slient scream...alll of em!
Please don't have an abortion. You need to take some time and think about the big picture- would YOU love the child less without 2 hands? I am willing to bet you won't. It is only an inconvenience, not something to end a life over. If you feel like this isn't something you can handle at such a young age, contact your local adoption agency (you can call a church for names and phone numbers or ask your Dr.). There are so many couples out there that want a child who won't care that she is missing a hand. I am not preaching about abortion, but at this point, she is a living being, and killing her is not the answer.
I actually have a professor that is missing his right hand (from birth). he's an artist! He's always been very well liked, and while it's uncomfortable for the first 5 minutes you meet him, his wit and humor make up for it immediately. I don't even notice it anymore. Just because a baby is missing a hand doesn't mean you should love them any less, much less abort them.